Want New Clients? Try This

Posted on May 11th, 2010 by Keith Ferrazzi

I pulled this great success story from the Relationship Masters Academy forums and used it to create some specific takeaways for you guys.

The success story is Leah Grant’s. She’s an RMA coach with her own independent practice, and she’s taking the program herself. She wrote the following to share what happened on one of her “missions”:

I asked my CPA out to lunch. I had never met her because my bookkeeper always dealt with her. She arrived a little stiff and had brought her laptop thinking I wanted to go over my taxes. I chose a quaint fish shack with outdoor tables, paper towels as napkins and a great ocean view for us to meet. When I told her I just wanted to get to know her, she completely perked up and said none of her clients had ever invited her out to get to know her. We had a fun lunch and she hooked me up with two new potential clients and we made plans to get together with her husband and my boyfriend this summer.

Here are three takeaways from Leah’s mission success:

1. Don’t be afraid to take the first step in making a relationship more personal. Nine times out of ten people are pleased – sometimes even honored – that you cared to get to know them.

2. Turn over every stone when building your network. Have you ever thought that your CPA might be a business or career resource for you? What other people in your life have you failed to get to know well enough to learn how you might help each other, outside of your professionally prescribed relationship?

3. To build intimacy, get someone out of their normal space. Break bread together, and forget the fancy! You’re better off taking the leap at your favorite fish shack than somewhere you picked out of Zagat because you thought it would be impressive.


So go out there and try it! Share your ideas in the comments for who and how you could try this approach.

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17 Responses so far | Have Your Say!

  1. Diane Fennig says:
    May 11, 2010 at 3:45 am
    Reply

    As a next step, invite someone to your home for an event. It can be as simple as appetizers, a brunch, or a dinner party. Most are honored with an invitation into your world and when added with intimacy that is genuine, this will pay great dividends. As the host/hostess you are sharing yourself and your network. As we all know, we do business with people we trust and we like.

  2. Excellent article! I think people are hesitant to open up and be vulnerable with each other--but that need is there in all of us. Building relationships is a very valuable part of business on a day-to-day basis. People will only do business with people who they know, like, and trust. Notice the first step is "know"...I think your take on the matter is rather insightful. I hope your readers will take it to heart!

  3. Thank you for this wonderful advice -- it's the sort of thing that attracted me to read _Never Eat Alone_ a while back. I feel more encouraged to take the initiative in inviting people to get together. This was just what I needed to read today!

  4. A corollary to this principle is that everybody matters, not just because anybody could become a link to new client and opportunities, but because everybody is a human being that deserves kindness and a little attention. Practically, though, by treating everyone with respect, we open up many future possibilities.

    Master magician Jeff McBride owes much of his success to this kind of thinking. When he began his magical career, he went out of his way to build relationships with stage hands, the people commonly ignored and abused by stars. He would treat them as equals, joke with them, chat, and be kind. Years later one of those stage hands moved up the ranks and became a V.P. at Caesar's Palace, and his respect for Jeff McBride led to important new opportunities for Jeff. Jeff remains one of the truly kind and classy folks in that industry. May that approach be part of what we do with those around us all the time.

  5. Hello I truley tried to do this since reading the book Never Eat Alone a few moinths ago.I feel building and maintaining relationship is crucial to the success of my company however with over 30 invites I have not once been taken up on my offer.I have even tried for coffee as I know most of these attorneys are busy but what do I do when they will not accept? Please help !

    • Hi Melissa:

      I'm one of the coaches on Keith's RMA team; and my first thought is that maybe they think you just want to "pitch" them? The key here is that Leah spread her invitation out to someone not in her normal day to day circle. Even this person presumed it was business.

      Perhaps you can clarify right out of the gate by inviting them to a park or a museum or the new cupcake shoppe because you want to get to know them better or hear what is new in their world. (in fact Keith is famous for meeting people at his gym!) Tell them up front what it won't be: a pitch. Tell them you would love to spend time getting to know them without shop-talk. And then of course stick to it.

      Most attorney's I know work so many hours that they guard their "after hours" as precious. Perhaps that will improve your success rate - a clear message that this is not just another way to pitch them.

  6. I give job search seminars at schools and libraries and always suggest that whenever possible people invite an informational interview contact out to lunch or breakfast. I've practiced this technique since I was a secretary in an ad agency and wanted to move up. I asked my boss's boss to lunch to ask his advice about my career path and ended up with free copywriting lessons at a terrific school and a mentor who supported my promotion to junior copywriter within the year. Since then lunch and breakfast meetings have led to jobs, clients, and relationships that have supported me through various ups and downs. I call it "altruistic self-interest" and my guiding principle is "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you - and do it first."

  7. I love this post...it made me smile! One thing I have learned is that making connections is all about showing people that you truly care about their wellbeing. Great post Keith!

  8. And to make that attempt to cultivate a deeper relationship:

    4. Ask an open-ended question, listen deeply to the answer and ask a follow-up question that is directly related to what she answered (rather than reverting the conversation back to you). More ideas on this in Keith's biz partner's book, Just Listen.

    5. Follow-up afterwards with a note/email, thanking the person for the opportunity to get to know her better and mention 2 things you specifically enjoyed.

  9. Always enjoy your topics!

  10. If someone recommends you connect with someone, do it! A friend told me "You must meet Bob! The 2 of you would get along!" So I met Bob over lunch.

    He and I did hit it off, and he invited me onto his VC advisory board.

    On the board I met Norm. Norm and I bonded, and he invited me to write a column for his on and offline magazine.

    As a result of that, McGraw Hill found me online and asked me to be a SME editor for a book they were publishing on how to run a professional services firm. I did, we bonded and they asked for a book proposal.

    I worked with them to create one, but the McGraw Hill local office closed right as it was about to go before their review committee. I assumed my book proposal was going on some overwhelmed person in NYC's slush pile, so I moved on.

    I then took that proposal, and went to a book publishing and marketing conference. I got a slot to pitch an agent.

    I humbly approached and practiced my pitch with everyone I could, including some big names (what the heck - I already didn't know them - what was there to lose?). They were incredibly generous with their advice, which helped me improve my pitch tremendously. (I had a plan for the conference, BECAUSE YOU RECOMMENDED IT in "Never Eat Alone")

    I did get an agent, then a book deal with Palgrave Macmillan, and "Selling Your Business For More" was published this spring.

    All because someone recommended I connect with someone, and I took the time to do it!

    Did I know where this was heading? No. Did I have a goal at each turn? No, but because I was genuine and respectful in my interactions and helpful everywhere I could be, doors opened and it changed the trajectory of my life.

  11. Very cool story. One piece of advice I received on networking at events is to always schedule in opportunities for serendipity. Sometimes the best business opportunities come out of experiences that are decidedly not about business.

  12. Great post Keith.
    I sometimes fall into this trap when I get so busy about business. Stepping back, taking a breath, and asking personal questions is the best way to show you care

  13. Clint Jolly says:
    May 13, 2010 at 8:03 am
    Reply

    I was recently on the receiving end of a similar situation. A casual aquaintance of mine who sells insurance called and invited me to lunch. We met, chatted about life, business, etc. Near the end I asked him why he wanted to meet up and he simply said that he wanted to get to know me better. No sales, no business cards, no motives. It was a refreshing feeling!

  14. Great post!

    I just finished reading Keiths book and thought it was great!

    But I'm Always fearful about organising meetings such as these or even random phone catchups bcause I'm scared I'll runout of conersation! And I hate that u comfortable feeling!

  15. I was in hotel sales management for many years. We used our restaurants to entertain, but my first comment was: "Let's enjoy the food, we can talk about business later."

    That usually broke the ice and allowed us to get to know each other before discussing their upcoming plans. An enjoyable meal together can establish a bond from the start.

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