Six Ways to Ensure You NEVER Have to Attend Another Useless Networking Event

Posted on August 28th, 2009 by Keith Ferrazzi

Time is the coin of your life.  It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent. Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you.  - Carl Sandburg

Have you recently found yourself holding on for dear life at the cash bar of some catch-all networking event? As you may have already realized, you’re wasting your time. Forget these awkward networking evenings that often wind up being de facto pink slip parties.

Remember, you create your reality with every choice you make about how to spend your next hour. Spend too much time at desperate, shallow meet and greets, and even the most positive, genuine connector can start to feel desperate and shallow. So why not spend your networking time doing things you love instead?

New plan: Make a list of the things you’re most passionate about, then use that list as a guide to deciding which activities and events you should be seeking out. Use favorite activities to engage new and old contacts. If you love baseball, for example, take potential and current clients to a ballgame. It doesn’t matter what you do, only that it’s something you love doing.

Your passions and the events you build around them will create deeper levels of intimacy. Pay attention to matching the event to the particular relationship you’re trying to build. I’ve got an informal list of activities I use to keep in touch with my business and personal friends. Here are some things I like to do:

1. Fifteen minutes and a cup of coffee. It’s quick, it’s out of the office, and it’s a great way to meet someone new.

2. Conferences. If I’m attending a conference in, say, Seattle, I’ll pull out a list of people in the area I know or would like to know better and see if they might like to drop in for a particularly interesting keynote speech or dinner.

3. Invite someone to share a workout or a hobby (golf, chess, stamp collecting, a book club, etc.).

4. A quick early breakfast, lunch, drinks after work, or a long, slow dinner together. There’s nothing like food to break the ice.

5. Invite someone to a special event. For me, a special event such as the theater, a book-signing party, or a concert is made even more special if I bring along a few people who I think might particularly enjoy the occasion.

6. Entertaining at home. I view dinner parties at home as sacred. I like to make these events as intimate as possible. To ensure they stay that way, I generally will invite only one or two people I don’t know that well. By dinner’s end, I want those people leaving my home feeling as if they’ve made a whole new set of friends, and that’s hard to do if it’s a dinner filled with strangers.

And while we're on the subject of networking, who out there has tried out Penelope Trunk's Brazen Careerist, the social network for career-minded Gen-Y'rs and the people who want to hire them? Check it out!

Send a trackback!
7 comments // In Relationship Development Skills
Bookmark and Share
« Previous Post Next Post »

7 Responses so far | Have Your Say!

  1. I'll add my favorite suggestion to people suffering from networking overload:

    Think about the events you regularly attend. Do you enjoy them? Do you meet new people or strengthen existing useful relationships? Do you dred it when you see them on your calendar?

    If your answer is yes to these questions, stop going and take a nap instead. We're all sleep deprived and this is a much better use of your time.

  2. I agree, Keith, but here's my problem. How do I find people to invite to my clubs and have coffee or dinner with me? They're all at the networking events.

  3. I agree with Steve.

    I go a go/no go analysis on events in terms of costs and other logistics to see if attending is worth my time. I also ask the following questions: 1) Who will this event attract? 2) When I attended comparable event, did I walk away with "quality" connections? 3) Does host organization cater to folks that I currently do or want to do business with? 4) Is this a group that I would consider joining?

  4. My friend Ben & I were just lamenting the "contrived" networking scene the other day, when he passed this on to me. (If Ben had a web presence already, I'd give him props right now! Grunt, grunt!)

    I'd been wondering how to avoid those d@mn networking events and still get network traction by being my true to myself. Your six ways has given me some ideas about really making my network my own, something to enjoy and look forward to!

  5. I organize a monthly luncheon. At first this started out with a small group of 6-7 of us getting together to brainstorm. That group grew to 15, then 20 and next thing ya know, it's turned into a monthly event with new faces each time!

    I'm also a big fan of getting together for coffee with folks. It's great for getting out of the office every now and again (which is always very refreshing!).

  6. These are excellent tips, Keith.

    I had to smile when I read Steve's comment about taking a nap instead of attending an unproductive meeting. That is absolutely brilliant! :)

  7. Question:
    What would you do for the first 30 days (month) of starting a new "company" to attract business.....each day?
    Susan

Leave a Reply