Have Them at “Hello”: Pre-Meeting Prep to Speed Up Relationship Building

Posted on December 17th, 2009 by Keith Ferrazzi

Happiness never decreases by being shared. – Siddharta
If you want to have a meeting that stands out as the BEST thing that happened to that person that day, you can’t wait until the appointed hour to get the relationship building in motion.  You need to set the environment in advance. Here’s three ways to do that.

1.    Send a friendly email the day before. Tell them how much your looking forward to meeting them. Even better, share a relevant news story or quote you came across – if you’ve done your homework, you already have a good idea if it will interest the person.

2.   Offer to get Starbucks on your way – for the admin, too. Make it casual: “I’m getting coffee and thought since I’m on my way, I could bring something for you and Jennifer too.” And make sure you get the order right!

3.    Get them away from their desk. See if they’ll take the meeting outside of their office – if they don’t want to go offsite, even downstairs in the company canteen is an improvement from them on one site of the desk, you on the other. I’ve studied this carefully and can tell you: There is a direct relationship between someone’s proximity to their desk and their willingness to act like an a#$hole. If you can get them outside, you’re almost guaranteed better behavior.

How do you prime the pump for building business relationships?

Send a trackback!
8 comments // In Relationship Development Skills
Bookmark and Share
« Previous Post Next Post »

8 Responses so far | Have Your Say!

  1. Mahelia de Randamie says:
    December 17, 2009 at 6:52 am
    Reply

    I really love the first tip and will start doing that from now on also.

  2. I love the second tip. I have learned so much from you book, Never Eat Alone. I am a huge advocate of all the tips in it, especially the dinner party. For all young professionals (being one myself) I think that your advice should be in tandem with our diplomas upon graduating. Can't wait to read more.

  3. I am a server, and I always trying to find ways to be better, and ideally I would like to have the table of guests at "Hello" yet, I can't really email them, get them coffee (unless they ask for it), and they are already away from their desk and more or less, at mine.

  4. Excellent advice!

    In addition, I read through people's Twitter streams and Facebook profiles to see what they're up to both personally and professionally (like if they've celebrated a birthday, attended an event or had a recent promotion, recently traveled somewhere, etc.). This usually makes for good discussion and well, people like that you care and take an interest.

  5. Having a conversation while sitting on the same side of the table certainly gets things flowing much better. I may have gone a little too far when I left a text for someone who wanted to interview me for a new job, asking if they wanted to join me at a Ranger game to which I had tickets, and interview me there. Never was able to reach that person again.
    My Bad???

  6. simple yet effective tips, very nice!

  7. I use Microsoft Outlook as my email program. There are several commercial add-ons that will sync your contacts with their Facebook profile picture, even if you are not their "friend" (yet) on Facebook. (Remember, you may not be able to see their details on Facebook, but you can always see their "face" picture!)

    This can be enormously helpful if you've only had an email relationship with someone...you can walk into a crowded meeting/restaurant/event and immediately recognize a person even though you've never met!

    • Great tips, I just finished your book and found it so helpful. I've always been very outgoing and social, but thought it wasn't ok to network. Now I know what I was doing right and what I can improve on. Thank you!!!!

      Bob- I love the Outlook pictures idea- that would be enormously helpful for me too. Is there any application that you prefer?

Leave a Reply