What I’ve Learned from Dumpster Kids, a Buddhist Monk, and Other Wise Teachers (Part 2)

Posted on January 11th, 2011 by Keith Ferrazzi

This is a four-part series sharing lessons in joy, success, and even fidelity, that I brought back with me from a 2-week service trip to Thailand and Cambodia at the close of 2010.

Lesson #2: Make every day a meditation by walking slowly, listening deeply, and counting breaths, not sheep.

On New Years Day, all the orphanages were closed to us so I wanted to go to a temple, to sit among the majesty of hundreds or thousands of years of spirituality and be guided through a beautiful reflective experience looking toward 2011. As it turns out in Thailand it’s a tradition to do just that on the last day of the year. Smart folk.

Our meditation at the temple was lead by Monk Thomas – another wise one who chose his own family. He was born of an English father and a Thai mother, not easy for a child in Thailand.  Over time and through deep exploration of what was important to him, Thomas chose to make a new family in a life of devotion.

I know about and have experienced the benefits of meditation but have nevertheless rarely found the time to practice it daily.  When we arrived that day, we were ushered to the fluorescent-lit storage area with old steel desks that the temple called their office.  We were told the temple was full but we would do our meditation here.  (Here?  Really? With all the cool flashy gold stuff upstairs we were going to sit here?) And then I saw the spiders.  Many spiders.  (Why didn't I just stay back at the hotel pool?) We were instructed to clear some boxes for a pathway of about ten feet and the instruction began.

First, listening meditation.  As I sat on a steel chair, Monk Thomas started into his standard speech about what we would learn. But then he interrupted himself. "You know, we can even meditate while we listen,” he said pointedly. “Perhaps you find yourself disappointed by our scenery, perhaps a little angry that you sat in traffic for an hour to get here, and maybe you are thinking that you are missing EVERYTHING upstairs, the beautiful gold reclining Buddha that you came to see...."

I was beginning to think maybe the temple was totally empty and Thomas had put us with the spiders as a lesson. I took the hint. I started to look at him and listen, deeply.  I recognized that these thoughts he got me to cop to were not only distractions but distractions I was actively choosing. I needed to let them float by and focus only on him. I got myself to stop thinking about what I would say if he were to stop. Then I thought about how many times I’ve cut off other people's sentences and completed them myself. And what it would be like to sit and really listen to someone – and how it would feel to them to know they were being truly heard and respected.  What it would do for my own understanding of their point of view and what it would do for my blood pressure!  If this was meditation, I could do it. I could listen. Every day.

His point made, Thomas moved on. "How about sleeping?" Now he had my attention.  I don't get much sleep but I do sleep every day.  Monk Thomas suggested that as we lie down to go to bed, we shouldn’t shift around.  Don't focus on the day or tomorrow.  Don't count sheep.  Just lie still and observe your breath. If you have a thought, observe it, then refocus on your breath.

Finally when the time came for us to meditate we didn't sit as I had thought one did.  Instead we were instructed in the art of walking meditation. We were to walk slowly, deliberately, and attentively while saying a simple mantra, "I am walking, I am walking, I am walking." When we ran out of space, we were to say, "I am standing, I am standing, I am standing," and "I am turning, I am turning, I am turning." Then "I am wanting to walk, I am wanting to walk, I am wanting to walk." And again, "I am walking, I am walking, I am walking."

In walking – even to the bathroom – we can practice being present in our bodies, our actions. I can indeed meditate every day, and so can you for greater peace of mind, health, and focus for prosperity and joy.

Check out part one here.

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11 Responses so far | Have Your Say!

  1. Read this morning that “The only Zen you find on the tops of mountains is the Zen you bring up there.” – Robert Pirsig

    Your beautifully articulated post reaffirms it in a way most urban residents can relate with and understand.

  2. Wonderful post! What a great way to start my day and ensure that I always focus on the the here and now.
    Thank you.

  3. Thank you Keith.

  4. In a work environment that sometimes seems to be out-of-control, this really hit home. Focusing on breathing is so simple, yet so effective in helping to bring back perspective.

    Thank you, I needed that.

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  6. I can certify from my experience over last 9 years that ‘Focusing on breathing’ is a simple and doable technique to reduce the wandering of the mind and make the meditation more enjoyable and fruitful. After a few months of this practice, the mind becomes remarkably more obedient. I found that the focus on breathing can be dramatically enhanced by using the fingers to track the breaths. We can use the tips of the fingers as described below or the segments of the fingers.

    **** TIP MODE: Touch the tip of the thumb to the tip of the little finger. Breathe in and out three times, counting in the mind, every time you breathe out. During the first out breath count ‘one’, second out breath ‘two’ and during the third out breath ‘three’. Repeat the same steps at each of the next three finger tips. When you are at the thumb, place the tip of the index finger at the base of the thumb and breathe three times. Then switch to the other hand and repeat the same process. Continue practicing, switching the hands. You will feel its calming effect, by the time you complete 4 to 6 hands, which takes 2 to 3 minutes. You can use this mode, anywhere and anytime to avert potential stress or dissolve built up stress!****

    I have been using ‘focusing on breathing’ technique throughout the day from the time I wake up till I again lie in bed to sleep. During meditation, initially, I count my breaths in sets of three and when the mind becomes less distracted I switch to my mantra.

    For five other modes of ‘focusing on breathing’ - Segment mode, Counting mode, Feeling mode, Staring mode and 911 modes, please visit this page http://countingbreaths.com/fob/relax/how-can-i-do-it/

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