Six Useful Lessons (and Reminders) from my Recent Marketing Debacle

Posted on December 22nd, 2010 by Keith Ferrazzi

A few weeks ago I was speaking at an event and two fans of our work shared their personal concern, and I could tell disappointment, due to a series of marketing emails that were sent in the run up to the launch of the Relationship Masters Academy. One lady said that Who’s Got Your Back had saved her life and she felt she had to come and see me in person to understand what was the truth – was the real Keith the one in the book or the one in the pushy emails?

That feedback came in the midst of a week of emails, blogs, and tweets echoing the same. I’ve been thinking about the situation ever since. First up, I need to say I’ve been listening. I am truly grateful for such vocal generosity in letting me know that I let you down. Exactly the behavior we all need to practice with those we care for.  Thank you for caring.

So let’s talk about how a guy who believes in authenticity, candor, and generosity above all ends up sending out a bunch of crazy-Eddie "act now or else" give away-style emails to his fans and clients.
I think the details will just feel like excuses and are frankly not that important for the purposes of passing on what I’ve learned.  But basically, we hired outside experts who have made a science of how to hit the numbers in email campaigns.  And our team, new and under pressure to succeed right out of the box in the online consumer space, thought we could control and customize their techniques to avoid messaging that wasn’t in line with my identity. The campaign was a financial success and at the same time we utterly failed.  And I am sorry.

As you guys were quick to realize, those emails were just not me. Ironically, even though I didn’t craft them myself, they had a voice and tone that was weirdly reminiscent of that kid I once was at Yale who, in unfamiliar territory, tried to fit in by working hard NOT to be himself. Thank God that back then, enough of me shined through for many to forgive my occasional lapses – maybe some even understood where they came from – and ultimately look to me as a friend and leader. Well, I'm hoping for the same again.

I’ve always said that marketing is really just another word for relationship-building at a distance.  With e-mails it’s in a virtual environment, but it’s all about figuring out what people need and offering value (by giving generously), confidently treating people with the utmost of respect (by speaking authentically and candidly) so they will listen to the story you have to tell (sharing deeply and intimately), and finally, making clear promises and then keeping them (by being accountable).

Together with my team, we put together a list of things we learned in the last month, which anybody can benefit from. I’m also hoping you’ll contribute your own rules and insights in the comments section to benefit others.
-KF

Six Rules for Building Relationships Online -- And Off

1. Define your values clearly, both to yourself and to others. The older I get and more success I experience, the more I believe that we win when we authentically believe in what we are selling (products, ideas…) and represent ourselves in a way that makes us proud.  That said, the tough thing is that you have to be self aware enough to know exactly what you care about, and then do your best to be true to that.  This can be especially challenging when you’re growing and developing your business, but you can’t let others bend who you are. Commit to an ongoing process of self-evaluation.

[Click thru for the next five rules.]

2. ALWAYS lead with generosity. Generosity starts with a solid understanding of the individual and your pre-existing relationship. You get there by asking questions and paying attention until you’re clear on what they really need. Then, speak in a language that’s familiar and consistent. Anything else is at worst condescending, and at best, blockheaded.

3. Don’t phone it in. There are times when relationships require our personal attention, and it’s best to err on the side of caution rather than risk the impression that you’ve outsourced your responsibilities. That’s unacceptable, so when those times come, do what it takes to be present. Otherwise you risk losing an important relationship (or thousands!).

4. The buck stops at you. My wrestling coach Mr. Brown used to say that there are two types in this world, those who make excuses and those who get the job done right.  No excuses.  You are 100 percent responsible for anything that has your name on it.

5. Strong relationships are always two-way. Chris Brogan just reminded me of this recently, pushing me to do a better job with @replies on Twitter. It’s easy to fall into the “broadcast” mentality in our virtual communications, when what’s needed is a conversation. One client comes to mind as does a very close friend who never answer e-mails – so frustrating! Be present, ask for feedback early and often, and when you get it, respond. Also, when considering your communication strategy to any segment or individual – whether a marketing campaign, a presentation, or just a coffee – make sure to make listening as much a part of the plan as speaking.

6. When you mess up, come clean. Ask for help. Carefully consider where you went wrong and how to avoid it in the future. Then take steps to correct your course.

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41 Responses so far | Have Your Say!

  1. Another rule which I have written on a small card in my wallet, "Practice What You Preach." (Actually it says, "Practicing what you preach is a real bitch but do it anyway." But you get the point.)

    It sounds like you have a wonderful opportunity here to take your own advice, not just philosophically but strategically and tactically.

    To provide one quick example... at Big Task & RMA, you have Peter Guber talking about "telling a story" for business success. This was a highlight for me personally (in both places) and solid advice.

    It's no surprise that selling with case studies and the actual stories and success of our customers works so well. Yet, one of the things which struck me about the marketing for RMA is that the testimonials (and stats) felt like an afterthought.

    Happy to provide more detailed, objective feedback as a "buyer" anytime. The great thing is you have this wonderful product which you know works. Just gotta figure out how to tell the story and in a way which is truly reflective of the experience (and of your brand.)

  2. Keith,
    well done. Now this post was "all Keith", very impressive. Indeed the e-mail campaign made me raise an eyebrow every now and then. Wishing all the best of luck with your communications-comeback.
    Thanks for the help RMA has been providing.
    have a great day
    d.

    (the website indicated is a community involvement project of mine I feel more appropriate to share in these days then the business website)

  3. Keith, I received the emails and did not think much about it. You provide a lot of free and helpful content and for that - thanks a bunch. I always stop and read the email each time I receive it. If you are selling something (and who isn't) then you are trying to find your way in the maze and still have some self-respect. I sure have received a lot of grace along my trial and error path, I am happy to extend some. Keep trying to find your way, I will be as patient with you as you are with me.

  4. Maybe your generous heart and your authentic way didn't shine through in the marketing of RMA, but it is always there and it shot out like a cannon in this posting. I am enormously grateful for the opportunity that was offered. My only reaction was a touch of worry when I kept receiving the offer after I had paid for the course. If the blast ran anyone off then that is unfortunate. It is their loss.
    Thank you Keith,
    Thank you Sara,
    I love RMA

  5. So here's my question...whatever these guys did, it worked (financial success). You're well-known and successful and your fan base will (may?) respond to a different approach, but we know they responded to THIS approach.

    How do you maintain who you are when you aren't the "Crazy Eddie" that works to make it a financial success, and still be able to have a financial success when you are just getting started?

  6. Keith,

    It is great to hear your honesty when you know that you have made a error in choosing a professional marketing strategy that was not your own, nor did not carry your own voice. I've done the same and the response was a backlash to not using my own voice and taking a route that did not share my own insight or authenticity.

    Engagement has to come from oneself, there really is no other way. Your readers know the difference, question your authority and decision making and feel ripped off when not spoken to from your authentic self.

    Thanks for coming clean, it brings to light the fact that we all make decisions based on what we believe might be right at the moment and that growing pains happen at all stages of success.

    Blessings,
    Skye King

    Female Internet Entrepreneur Editor

  7. Patricia Polischuk says:
    December 22, 2010 at 7:07 am
    Reply

    Keith, I honestly zoned out on the pushy emails - if your advice and information was not helpful in the first place I would have unsubscribed long ago. That being said, thanks for sharing your lesson - you are definitely someone who walks the talk and learning is all part of that walk, we all stumble but I think you've just helped many of us avoid the same pitfall in the future. Your honesty and candour is appreciated - HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!!

  8. Keith, thanks for the candor in this post. In fact, I did have similar feelings when I saw your emails as the lady, although much less intense. At the same time, I was aware of the marketing strategies behind the email marketing campaign (did some of them myself when I was testing the online space like you), but couldn't help but being a little bit concerned. To maintain your brand, I think there's definitely improvement that can be made to the frequency and the content to the emails in the future - maybe spread them out a tiny bit, reduce excessive repetition, and write them out yourself so it feels more like Keith (with the expert's help of course).

    Having said that, I don't really mind because the RMA stuff is really good! Keep up the good work :)

  9. Hi Keith,

    I love your candor and willingness to take full responsibility. If more people or companies did this, the world would be a different place.
    I do a lot of work with entrepreneurs on selling without being pushy it can be done but like anything it takes practice, patience and it isn't an overnight success.
    As an online marketer myself, I also balance on the line of promoting my products and building a relationship with my readers so I look forward to seeing how you do this going forward.

  10. Hi Keith,

    First, I want to say I appreciate your honesty in this post.

    While you have done an excellent job talking about the importance of authenticity, my other concern is as follows: why the fixation on instant success as opposed to taking a more long-term view?

    It sounds like if you go one layer deeper here, part of the problem may stem from placing immediate success ahead of building a stronger foundation for long-term success. If the RMA really is that good, you will hit your long-term goals because people will recommend it to their friends.

    One solution is for everyone on your team to read "Tribes" by Seth Godin, and then to read it again. Then, whenever you're struggling with a marketing decision, ask yourself a simple question: "Would Seth Godin ever employ this sort of marketing tactic?" If the answer is no, then nix the idea. If the answer is yes, it's worth further consideration.

    • Keith Ferrazzi says:
      December 22, 2010 at 11:10 am
      Reply

      Yoni, this is great advice - long-term thinking creates much better decision-making. What do you think, can I get a "What would Seth Godin do?" bracelet?

      • It couldn't hurt haha. Maybe this is the next best thing: http://uk.moo.com/readymade/pack/1001

        (The link is for business cards with Seth Godin quotes on the back.)

        In all seriousness though, I think it would provide a quick and easy mental model to work with. It's not as if you need to go and read over old blog posts or books of his every time you wrestle with a decision.

        It's more that asking the question primes your mind to think with a longer horizon in mind.

  11. Keith, Crazy Eddie brings me back. "His prices are practically innnnnssaaaannnnne!" Way to go for "owning it." The power of "I'm sorry" is always amazing to behold.

  12. Thank you all so much for your generous feedback and willingness to forgive. I promise we'll do better moving forward!

  13. Keith, thank you for that, but, there is no need to apologise. I agree with commentators Patricia Polischuk and Robert Coop. We have all received so much help from you – and for FREE – over the years that far outweighs any marketing strategy some felt wasn’t your authentic voice. How can you possibly oversee everything?

    For me, a freelance writer living in a remote part of southern France, your weekly tips are invaluable. I love the sense of connection, and the advice on getting oneself sorted through helping others, building confidence, planning for goals, doing a weekly output through a blog, has all contributed to my success to date, including the thrill of being part of a USA publication this fall; http://www.goodbyebook.com

    Thank you so much and best wishes for 2011 to you and all at the Ferrazzi organisation.
    Jane
    09200 Moulis
    France

  14. I'm so glad you addressed this point. I had very very recently learned about you and your work and was interesting in buying your books. I had read several blog posts and watched a dozen or more videos on YouTube. Then the e-mails started coming, and I was immediately turned off. Just one more guy looking for buck (or several thousands).

    In addition, I had read about and found the website for the Greenlight Community and had signed up on 11/18. My registration was pending approval for several weeks with no contact link on that website to inquire as to the status. So I sent an inquiry to the contact on your blog website, only to be told that GC was defunct and I had to join RMA. Another huge disappointment. If the GC website is defunct, why was it still visible, and why was there still a way to try to sign up? When I sent some questions back, I received no response.

    Both of these experiences had negatively affected me.

    To see you put this out here to the world and admit your mistake is incredible. I hope more business leaders follow your example. I know of a few hundred politicians and more than a handful of multi-national corporations who could sure follow your example!

    Thanks again for publicaly addressing this, and keep up the great work!

    (Please do address to GC issue - if the website is no longer active, remove it or remove the Sign Up link. When I go to that site it STILL says my membership is "Pending Approval...")

    Cheers -
    Victoria

    • Hi Victoria! Sara here- program director at Keith's RMA. I wanted to jump in here because gracefully transitioning GC to our new community is my (neglected) responsibility. Thanks so much for putting this back on the top of our agenda: I have now removed access to the site, much overdue. As you already heard, this year we are building a new free portal for our community as part of RMA, which will have the benefit of a rich flow of content and interaction that we didn't have when we launched GC. Thanks for your patience with our disorder. One of our ongoing goals as a company is to focus our efforts for fewer loose ends - the awful result of trying to do too much!

  15. Great post full of sincerity!
    Well done!
    Jordi

  16. Keith: Good job! Taking responsibility is always the best policy. Trying to be authentic & genuine in cyberspace, is an enormous challenge. No matter how you do it or what you say, you can easily look and feel sleazy. (I have a saying in my work with our clients - "No matter how sleazy you get, there's always someone sleazier than you.") The double-edged sword of the age of information is always lurking in the shadows: You can reach enormous numbers of people, most of whom have the attention span of gnats in heat. The temptation, then, is to sound like a carny huckster, and/or to take the advice of internet pros, who are rarely values-driven. I'm facing the same challenge, these days, launching a new JV blended learning product, without sounding like we're selling blenders. In any case, stick with your values, be skeptical of "experts," and have a great holiday.

    Morrie

  17. Stephanie Karr says:
    December 22, 2010 at 11:53 am
    Reply

    Keith-
    Thanks for your email/blog post. It was the second email I'd received due to the timeline of reading the book and signing up for GC and I will admit it had me confused.

    I've reached some clarity through your blog post and these comments about your company, GC and RMA.

    Thank you for taking the time to reach out, and for using your own lesson as another successful case study.

    Best Wishes,
    Stephanie Karr

  18. Hi Keith,

    This was such a graceful post. I was so pleased to see it today and feel it really speaks to who you are and the message you put out there for others. Your apology, your recognition of what was wrong, taking total responsibility even though many things were out of your control and learning from your mistakes and making it a teaching moment for others are all pieces of your strong character.

    I think that your challenge is getting the word out about this great product without being spammy or pushy. When the message is pushy it does not align with your authentic and caring brand. But you have a great product and if you stay true and steady with carefully planned digital strategy and marketing and you are consistent with your approach and message I think you will find your product will fly "off the shelves." Online marketing takes time, patience and consistent effort to really be effective in the long run.

    My best,
    Nicole

    • Keith Ferrazzi says:
      December 22, 2010 at 1:30 pm
      Reply

      Nicole - thanks so much, your opinion means a lot. Nicole gave me some of the best feedback and advice on the emails.

  19. This is simply amazing. I am so impressed with what you have written here, Keith!

    Lately, several professionals whom I respect greatly (with messages I feel are important to the business world) have sent an average of 5 "salesy" emails to every content-based message. They all seem to be using the same formula, to the extent that I've wondered who the one wondrous Sales Guru-Consultant is who clearly advised them all. :-)

    Thank you for your pitch-perfect response. As Nicole wrote, it was gracefully done - and much appreciated!

  20. Jeffery Davis says:
    December 22, 2010 at 4:02 pm
    Reply

    Guess I should have listened to Mr Brown more. :-) Merry Christmas Keith

  21. It's such a relief to know that you have become aware that this marketing approach is in-congruent with your message.

    It is easy to get caught into the flow of a 'successful' marketing pattern that experts recommend. Unfortunately, validation for financial success in the short term does not mean sustainable financial success in the long-term.

    It would be great to see an online community that adheres to the values that you have shown so far in your books and lectures that I have been watching through Walden.

    How are you planning on marketing your next campaign? How are you planning to get to know your community, Keith, in order to develop their capabilities? How can we assist you in developing your next campaign to reflect the authenticity of your message?

    -- Sandra

  22. I also did not think too much of the emails, but yeah they were a tad on the 'needy' side perhaps.

    Either way, this email/post is a wonderful example of the adage of how companies can improve their image and customer satisfaction after resolving a problem- beyond where they had been BEFORE the problem. Thanks so much for sharing this.

  23. It is commendable, Keith, that you are willing to take ownership of a situation which ultimately does reflect on you personally, and what you purport to believe (and I mean this with no insinuation or sub-text). In this day and age, where mass communication between an individual and countless others is made possible through the Internet, I've grown accustomed to being besieged with people trying to sell something behind a veil of faux sincerity. This is especially true in economic times which have been trying for many of us, and I well understand the need and desire of people to make a living.

    The fact that you are publicly acknowledging that mistakes have been made and your own principles have been violated is refreshing. For all of the talk about personal branding, "paying it forward" and delivering value (especially among white collar professionals these days), I see a lot of lip service being paid but far too little in application. Through your books and newsletters, you have at least demonstrated viable techniques and approaches to networking which hopefully teach people that "it isn't all about them."

    By being authentic and well-intentioned, and truly making an attempt to connect with others and provide assistance where we can, we can enrich ourselves in tangible and intangible ways.

    That's part of the human experience we ought not to diminish or overlook...

  24. Rule # 7: When you've messed up and jeopardized an important business relationship, and/or the trust of many who feel sandbagged by what you've done, apologies are just the first step. It's just as important to make amends by undoing the damage you've done, or if that's not possible, by making an extraordinary effort and sacrifice that helps make those who have trusted you whole again.

    Without tangible, concrete action, Rules 1 through 6 are all just more talk.

    • Keith Ferrazzi says:
      December 23, 2010 at 6:36 am
      Reply

      Well said, Robert. I hope you wait and see - great stuff in the works for 2011. One of my commitments, in cooperation with the crackerjack RMA team, is to increase the quality of the free content we share here. It's the best way I can think of to give back.

  25. I have to say, I deliberately did not purchase RMA because of both the sizzle-sizzle emails and because the LAST time I was prompted repeatedly to JOIN, JOIN, JOIN a Ferrazzi project it was Greenlight Community, which I initially loved and has since been obviously abandoned with no (to my knowledge) announcement about the pivot of focus or informing members of the direction of the site. I thought, okay, I would hate to spend money on this and have the community-aspect end the same way.

    But I also deeply respect publicly acknowledging the mis-step in e-tone. Props for that. As always, I respect the well-intentioned purpose and lean toward telling THAT story when friends ask me about Never Eat Alone or Who's Got Your Book. Two books that still retain their reign on my nightstand.

    • Hey Brin - see my note about Greenlight Community above, it provides some limited explanation/update. In the push to make RMA happen, we did a poor job communicating our direction and plans to GC. Actually, a terrible job. No job at all! This year we'll be refocusing on providing more free content and community underneath the RMA banner. I understand you may need to see it to believe it - fair enough! - but the good news is, it'll be FREE so there won't be any cost to finding out if we can up our game and serve our community better than we did in 2010, both through free delivery and our paid programs. Hope you join us for the journey.

      Sara Grace
      Program Director, RMA
      Former Community Director, Greenlight Community

  26. My colleague Jill Konrath (and my best coach of all time!) taught me that you never lead with the eye on the sale. When we launch these types of campaigns, we look for the sale rather than meet a need that our client wants filled. So whether your clients/customers are mass market or not, we all have to be fulfilling a need. And doing so in a manner that is true to what we tell others to do.

    These days, people can smell a pitch from miles away. In the world of permission marketing, we all have to be invited in. A hard lesson to learn. But an important one. Trust and integrity can be so quickly lost- especially in an environment of cynics. Everybody has an angle and want our time and attention. We have to earn the right to be listened to. And we always have to deliver. If everything we do is an angle to getting people to buy what we have to sell, then the sincerity is not there- and people will figure out you have another agenda. It's a humbling experience and likely a lesson learned.

  27. Hi, Keith. I'm not sure enjoyed is the right word for this post but I appreciated and respected it. It's difficult to say you're sorry and not add the word "but" but you accomplished the task.

    As someone who is proud to be an RMA Ambassador and who has struggled to engage some of the new students over the past month or so, I suspect you learned a seventh lesson -- mistakes can linger. I may be wrong but I suspect wavering from your core message attracted the wrong audience for the new class. The group seems less engaged as a whole despite a number of improvements in the program. I think the challenge for Sara and the rest of her terrific team is finding a way to get that group focused and motivated and understanding what makes your program and your philosophy so strong for those of us who have become better people and more successful as a result (and I chose the order of those two things carefully).

    Best wishes and thanks.

    Peter

    • Peter, thanks for this comment, but I have to disagree strongly with you. :) Engagement in the community aspect of the program is perhaps lower than it was with your cohort in Pilot II, whose members came into the program already on fire with the spirit of Never Eat Alone.

      But in Pilot II as now, there's no "wrong audience" in the program. RMA will always be a mix of people engaging it in different ways, on different levels - and in fact, those who purchased through our online campaigns are among the most engaged.

      We are very grateful for those who connect with RMA as a community and a philosophy - you are our Tribe - but there is space for others. And that tribe will grow over time, as we continue to create resources and opportunities to nourish them, and they spread their enthusiasm (and speak of their success) to others.

      Just to give everyone else here some background, Peter is one of our terrific RMA Ambassadors, the invitation-only volunteer squad who help us make the program truly transformative - not just a course but the supportive learning community and generosity-based philosophy that Peter references (and which I invite you all to be a part of!).

      We'll definitely continue this conversation. One thing you're entirely right about is that finding ways to turn people "on" to the Tribe will always be a primary goal - it's where we can make the most impact.

      • Hi, Sara...

        Wrong audience may have been the wrong way to put it. I don't recall how I came to be part of my pilot or what your overall approach was. I wonder -- and I emphasize wonder because I have no facts to back it up -- whether the relative frenzy of the pitch results in a different type of participant. I wonder if it parallels the timing of a purchase of a gym membership -- is the person who buys mid-year after lots of thought or talking to other members a more motivated participant than the person who buys as the result of a New Year's Resolution and then has some buyers' remorse after a few weeks.

        I think you have two challenges that are very different -- one is activation while the other is ongoing engagement. When I worked in the credit-card business, we found the biggest challenge was getting people to use their card for the first time after receiving it, and that one of the keys was the channel through which they applied. People who responded to direct mail activated at a much higher rate than someone who applied by the Internet or at an event or following a telemarketing call. I suspect you're already tracking participation levels by source of engagement.

        The second challenge is ongoing engagement and I think you guys are on the right track, based on what I've seen on this string and on the site itself. Like any good relationship (or marriage), success depends on both turning someone on and then finding a way to keep the fire burning. My best wishes and I hope to play some small role in helping this program be successful.

  28. Well said Keith, as one in the RMA program who was shocked by the level of 'pitch' and decided against renewing because of it - I applaud your honesty and 'mea culpa' - to play with your tagline "To err is human, your business relationships will grow with honesty".

    Just my toonies worth

  29. I have to say, that I wasn't offended by the marketing messages. At all.

    At a certain point, we have to realize, people are in business, trying to sell your services doesn't make you any less kind, sincere or generous.

    Maybe the "real" Keith is generous AND wants to grow his revenues. On an intellectual front, are we really so simple minded that we can't accepted someone trying a variety of approaches?

    On a human front, are we really so judgmental that after getting tons of fabulous, sincere, generous and free advice from someone, we're going to trash him and his team for a few messages we don't like.

    Good grief. Get a grip.

    Generosity is a two way street people, have we learned nothing? Being generous means giving people credit for good intentions and not jumping the gun with criticism.

    Lisa Earle McLeod

  30. Thanks for the post Keith and your honesty however I do feel and agree with Lisa that at the end of the day I was not that offended by the message and just assumed that you were attempting to get us to act on something that you felt passionate about.

    Thanks for the posts, content and sharing. All the best Nick Loise

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