How to Turn a Screw Up Into a Stronger Relationship

Posted on October 12th, 2010 by Keith Ferrazzi

Maybe you missed a scheduled call, didn'’t show up to an event you said you would, or double-booked meetings.  In short, you didn't do what you said you were going to do.  How do you not only save the situation, but end the exchange with a stronger relationship?

An apology letter or phone call is first.

Here are a few tips to get it right:

  • Be the Early Bird: Make the outreach as soon as possible. Don'’t wait!
  • Focus on the Fix-it: Take responsibility for your mistake, but shift quickly to the positive by clearly stating what you have already done or will do to rectify the situation.
  • •Wrap It: An unexpected gift (theater tickets, dinner on you in a great restaurant) is a simple way to show that the bad behavior, whatever it was, really isn'’t your style. Just remember, gifts are never a replacement for getting it right!

Once you've apologized, it's time to deliver, deliver, deliver. Make sure you follow through with whatever you've promised, and take extra care to get things right during your next interactions with the person. Your goal is to rebuild trust, and the only way to do that is with a clean track record going forward.

Screw ups do happen to everyone - albeit hopefully not too often! But what'’s most important is how you handle the aftermath.

Anyone have a story about a screw-up that ultimately made their relationship stronger?

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2 comments // In Conflict Resolution
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2 Responses so far | Have Your Say!

  1. Great advice. So many these days just ignore it and hope that it will blow over. Some don't even feel sorry for the mistake. We already value our own time but respecting the time of others seems to be what is missing these days.

  2. boy are you smart, intelligent , wow.

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