Tips for Conflict Resolution

Posted on April 15th, 2010 by Keith Ferrazzi

1. Keep your voice as calm and relaxed as possible. Use deep breaths, take a pause, master a Remo Williams-like state of self-control.

2. Use "I" statements not "You" statements.

An “I” statement lets you describe your own needs, values and feelings -- openly, honestly and directly. You are describing the situation instead of evaluating it.

  • Ex: “I am really discouraged by the lack of follow through I've seen lately.”

A “you” message emphasizes the second person pronoun and blames or accuses the other for your feelings, or judges others’ behavior. It's a great way to put someone on the defensive instead of starting open dialogue.

  • Ex: "Didn’t anyone teach you how to set a table? You should know by now that the spoon goes above the plate, not beside it. You need to fix all these tables right now.

3. Never forget: Patientia est virtus!

Send a trackback!
3 comments // In Communication
Bookmark and Share
« Previous Post Next Post »

3 Responses so far | Have Your Say!

  1. i add: ask many questions

    "Questions" is more impotant than "answers"

  2. Exactly what I have been thinking. Your text was unbelievable. To get your ex back is not the easiest of the tasks But it for sure can take some time

Leave a Reply