Comments on: Don’t Be a Jerk – SHARPEN Your Communication Skills

By: Ron Krumpos

Ron Krumpos — Sat, 24 Jul 2010 00:29:22 +0000

Don't talk, don't think, and don't react...concentrate on listening. When we talk we can't listen at all. When we think, we interrupt listening to them while formulating our own response. When we react - through facial, bodily or verbal indicators - we might disrupt them. In everyday, casual conversations this interchange is normal and expected. When someone is talking about something very personal, they are often hesitant or unable to reveal everything in their opening remarks. When they sense that you are truly interested, they will begin to develop it further. You, in turn, may be more willing to express your true feelings to someone who has opened themselves to you. Deep, meaningful conversations can result.

By: Sarah Anma

Sarah Anma — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 19:39:30 +0000

Listening is an action. When I remember this, the miraculous can and does happen.

When I take the time to really hear, rather than wait for my turn, both the speaker and myself have the space for an amazing experience.
One time someone thanked me for what they called my "Big, Listening Ear". I got the compliment a full 12 hours after I had resisted the urge to problem solve for them. I had given them the space to find their own solution. The art of ALLOWING is amazing but not always easy!

By: Jordi Robert-Ribes

Jordi Robert-Ribes — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 06:24:46 +0000

And of course... focus on the other person!
S/he should be the focus of your thoughts and not just focusing on your end of the conversation.
Jordi
(Networking & Business http://www.jordi.pro/netbiz )

By: John

John — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 12:49:14 +0000

I found two things that work for me. First, I am genuine in my concern for others and their causes or issues. I care about what they are saying at the time, make direct eye contact,and respond appropriately. Second, if I don't have an answer for them at that moment, I try to research an answer or connect them with resources that I believe will help them. I feel that not only is it good to listen, but it is equally important to follow through with action responses.

By: Tom Miller

Tom Miller — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 14:08:00 +0000

Some good points, however not entirely in-obvious. If you wanted some more in depth advice on improving your communications skills, id recommend this site that helped me a lot: http://www.salessense.co.uk/interpersonal_skills_training

By: Judith Baer

Judith Baer — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 05:42:52 +0000

What a great idea to start the day (it´s morning in Germany), to communicate with others about communication. Thanks for the opportunity to learn in this way. I think I will remember better what was said and the great advice of the three points, now that I feel a part of this. Fun! I´m reading "Never eat alone" and what did really impress me was the point of being vulnerable, talking about own mistakes and flaws makes other people feel save and real. Hope you all have a great day!

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Wed, 07 Jul 2010 02:22:39 +0000

[...] Don’t Be a Jerk – SHARPEN Your Communication Skills « Keith Ferrazzi [...]

By: Gilda Bonanno

Gilda Bonanno — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 18:56:50 +0000

To these useful tips, I would add - try to see the situation from the other person's point of view. Sometimes I think my way is the best (or only) way and therefore, I'm not open to disagreement. But if I remember to stop and ask the other person for more information about their idea or why they think it will work, I often find that we are working towards the same goal and just have different ways of getting there - and often, their idea is better than mine!

By: Dara Bell

Dara Bell — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 18:50:25 +0000

Hi,

I like Maries comment. I think we are all in the communications business not sales, sometimes people say that. Think they forget great salespeople often great communicators.

I like Lisa and Catherines points too. They are right empathy is SO important to have empathy and clarity in communication. Hud too has a gem of tip too. At least the person feels included when you nod, including people makes them want to buy into your idea, your concept maybe your product.

Thanks

Dara

By: Marki Conway

Marki Conway — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 18:44:16 +0000

These are pretty simple tips that anyone in the communcations field probably learned in their introductory classes. It's great to have this little reminder though because the problem is that so many of us forget the basics in our every day business and personal interactions. Great post, great reminder and great advice - thanks!