Comments on: Get Great Feedback – It Hurts So Good

By: SUNDER LALVANI

SUNDER LALVANI — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 13:48:32 +0000

Meghna, a very interesting post, thank u. Undoubtedly, one has not only be open to criticism but create an environment for a candid feedback (Keith). Nevertheless, it is essential to be able to perceive the objectivity of the feedback, to enable you to decide whether to act on it or not. I am quite sold to Leo's, "you spot, you got it."

By: Shanz

Shanz — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 12:12:35 +0000

Years ago I had problems with my self-esteem and I attended a weekly workshop conducted by my close friends. There a person has to stand on podium and face honest criticisms from audiences most of whom were my friends. I didnt realize many things I was doing like I was slouching, voice was weak etc. I took steps to rectify it and four years down the road I am different person completely.

One more thing to note is to take every advice with a grain of salt especially if it comes from non-experts. I dont shy from asking honest feedbacks from experts who can help me rectify many flaws and reduce the learning curve.

By: Leo MacLeod

Leo MacLeod — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 00:34:24 +0000

Meghna, Yes, it's good to get honest feedback, even if it hurts. However, we need to keep in mind it's not necessarily "true." Nothing is really true in relationships. It's just our projections and perceptions. What I have found is that criticism and judgements often illustrate as much about the sender. Our criticisms are often projections of things we are not happy in ourselves that are being triggered by something we see in others. I like to use the term "you spot it, you got it." Be careful about accepting someone's unfinished business and projections as the "truth.' There may truth in it, but don't believe everything you hear! Thanks.

By: saad

saad — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 07:07:28 +0000

Hi, I enjoy this blog and visit it at least weekly. But PLEASE REMOVE THAT "POP-UP" requesting people's email addresses. i eventually signed up thinking it'd go away (you know, web cookies) but obviously that isn't in effect and it is just damned annoying bc it actually covers up part of your content.

By: Katherine moody

Katherine moody — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 18:45:08 +0000

Good reminder to thank those who have the courage to be real with us. We often like people who say nice things but don't tell us what we need to know. But for me, it's those who tell me what might be hard to hear who are my true supporters. Thank you for the post!

By: Bob

Bob — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 11:59:05 +0000

Great post, Meghna, thanks! Your first point reminds me of a conversation I had with one of my college professors. I asked her for help after a lecture b/c I was having a hard time understanding the material. But each time I asked a question, I would interrupt her attempt to answer and try to answer it myself (because I didn't want her to think I was stupid of course!). Finally, she stopped me and said, "look, do you want my help or not? You don't seem ready to listen to anything I might offer you...".

Snap! It really hit home with me, and I always remember that interaction when asking someone for advice/input/feedback. Kind of relates to one of your previous posts about working with mentors - the key element of success are getting in a state of openness, communicating your intent to listen/learn and act on the feedback, and being vulnerable enough to admit you don't have all the answers.

Good topic that got my reflecting on how I can seek feedback more regularly and effectively - thanks!