Posted on February 17th, 2010 by Meghna Majmudar
Have you ever thrown yourself over the line at work?
By that I mean taking real emotional, personal risks with people who respect you professionally. Showing sides of yourself that you tend to keep under wraps.
It may sound scary, but I can tell you first hand that it can work MAGIC on your team.
Keith and I work every day to help individuals "go there," so that teams can quickly build an environment of trust and commitment that enhances their ability to work through business problems and achieve goals. In this work, I've witnessed exceptional moments where leaders have shared their most defining moments, devastating losses, and crippling fears. These moments, often accompanied by tears and respectful silence at the dinner table, transform the team, almost instantaneously.
This is the moment when that person has taken a risk, and has thrown him or herself over the line. And this is the moment where everyone in the room commits to that person’s success.
I always wondered, could I cross the line myself? I found out recently when as part of my training to become a coach I was asked to - don't laugh - try a "Lara Croft" personality on for size in front of a room full of 25 people. For this role-playing exercise, I was to be big, bold, and physical - all things I'm normally not. It required real vulnerability to "go there."
After taking this risk, I felt so much bigger and more powerful for it. Issues I had been dealing with came into perspective and became so much easier to address. I learned that in “throwing myself” across this imaginary line, I was suddenly bigger and bolder than my problems.
Just Remember:
- “Throwing yourself across the line” can help you get out of a rut or “up your game”; it's also a way to gain trust of those who watch you take the risk.
- Environment matters – make sure you are in a place where you can take a risk and you can land safely no matter what happens.
I’d love to hear your stories of throwing yourself over the line – what did you learn?
Meghna heads up the High Impact Teams consulting practice at Ferrazzi Greenlight with Keith. She is based in New York City. If you have questions or want to increase your team's impact, contact her at mmajmudar at ferrazzigreenlight dot com.
Posted on February 12th, 2010 by Sara Grace
This week the team at KeithFerrazzi.com had an exciting milestone: We got our first Relationship Masters Academy lessons uploaded into the new membership site! Don't get excited - you can't see them there yet, there's just a basic email sign-up page. But we'll share some great free content soon via that list - not giving up any details yet, but I'll let you know as soon as I can!
Now, links...
"In the company of nudists, no one is naked": Jeff Jarvis has a post that starts out in the land of co-ed naked German saunas (been there, done that) and ends up talking about the advantages of being more open about things that have traditionally embarrassed us, like correcting our own mistakes.
Still More on Naked: Jarvis' post is funny timing, since last week Pat Lencioni's new book Getting Naked came out, where "naked" is a stand in for vulnerable. Given that vulnerability is of the Four Mindsets in Who's Got Your Back, we're definitely big fans of Lencioni's work.
Frozen: Sticking with this unexpected skin-theme, I was intrigued by this article in Newsweek on Botox. Apparently it doesn't just freeze your muscles but your emotions too. I had wondered about that.
Unfrozen: Did the Super Bowl Google ad melt your heart? I was curious about who wrote the ad and mediabistro gave me the answer. I love that a 20-something dude wrote the most successful 45-second chick flick ever.
Total Career Success: During his book tour, Keith did a segment on a VoiceAmerica radio show called Total Career success. They're building their email list by offering a series of "7 powerful videos to help people who are out of jobs or would like to advance their careers." I haven't seen the videos myself, but they are free so if you're looking for work, it can't hurt to check them out!
Have a great long weekend everyone!
Posted on February 11th, 2010 by Keith Ferrazzi
Things are crazy here at TED so this is going to be quick and potentially typo-ridden. But I wanted to get a blog up to share some of the amazing ideas people are sharing -- basically just my notes from a couple of the talks. Hopefully I'll keep adding to it.
How to create a MOVEMENT- derek sivers!!! AWESOME TALK!!!
- the Leader needs guts to stand out and be ridiculed
- Leader embraces "first follower" as equal- the first follower transforms the lone nut into a Leader.
- Tipping point happens -as more people join in its less and less risky- they will be part of the in-crowd, if they hurry!!
- If you are a shirtless dancing guy, nurture first a few followers who get it
- Leadership is overglorified, but first follower transformed to a movement!
Four Conditions of Exponential Fundraising - Jennifer McCrea
- People don't give to an organization. They give to a better future for the world or for someone or for them
- Focus on the act of giving! Think about how it FEELS - SIM what surprised me, what inspired me, what moved me!??? That is why people GIVE.
- Shift from "Will you help me" to "let's work together on this." - a real connection of equals!
- Be radiant- the passion must come from US!! And people must feel it!!
Have you seen the list of speakers? Here was Wednesday's agenda: Read more →
Posted on February 10th, 2010 by Meghna Majmudar
Being at Ferrazzi Greenlight has given me such an appreciation for showing vulnerability in the workplace – e.g. sticking your neck out and admitting a weakness, without any idea what comes next. And unfortunately, it is so rarely done in an office environment.
Vulnerability is critical because, when shared appropriately, it helps you deepen social connections and get the help you may need.
Here are two critical ways to show vulnerability so that you are all the more powerful at work!
1. Share your fears honestly - without whining or being a victim. I used to whine and play the victim. Now when things get hard, I reach out and check with a colleague. I share my situation and ask, “Hey, am I looking at this the right way?” This way I'm not a victim of circumstance, I feel strong and proactive, and if I need it, I'm on my way to getting support I might not have found otherwise.
2. Ask for feedback. I used to think feedback was the second dirtiest f-word around. I always thought it was a euphemism for criticism. Cringe! And unfortunately, in many workplaces it is. But honestly, after Keith explained it as a “gift you want to give for the person’s success,” I was able to take feedback in stride. And now, it seems like I can’t get enough!
What I am trying to say is own your weaknesses at work. Be powerful with them, be the first to admit them, and what follows may surprise you.
What are your thoughts on showing vulnerability at work? How have you been powerful with your weakness?
Meghna heads up the High Impact Teams consulting practice at Ferrazzi Greenlight with Keith. She is based in New York City. If you have questions or want to increase your team's impact, contact her at mmajmudar at ferrazzigreenlight dot com.
Posted on February 9th, 2010 by Keith Ferrazzi
I had a great conversation this week with Dev Patnaik, author of Wired to Care and founder of a great firm, Jump Associates, which helps innovative companies like Nike and Target get even more innovative.
I asked for his advice on what marketing and sales folks should do TODAY to become more successful. If empathy is the solution, as Dev proposes, whose moccasins do you need to walk in?
Here’s what he said:
“The first thing they could do is just get outside. It doesn’t matter if they work in aircraft engines, or detergents, or for a grocery store chain. Every single person out there is getting a paycheck from someone out there in the world. That person is shopping in our stores, that person is buying our products – but they’re living in their homes and they’re spending their time in places that matter to them.
So the first thing you could do is get outside of your building. Skip that meeting, leave that conference room, and go spend some time hanging out in the real world. My friend John Morioka, who’s a senior exec at Target, is one of the best examples of this. When he’s trying to think about what he wants to do next in his business, he’ll get someone from one of his vendor companies to meet with him. But rather than spending time in a conference room, he says, ‘I’ll meet you in a grocery store.’ And they’ll have a conversation while they’re walking the aisles, and they’ll see things and know things that the rest of us would have to read about to know what was going on.”
Great advice from a great guy! Wired to Care should be required reading for leaders who wants to help their team, as Dev put it, “make 10,000 better decisions.”
What’s your advice – one thing somebody could do TODAY to improve their sales or marketing skills or strategy?
Posted on February 2nd, 2010 by Keith Ferrazzi
The best portion of a good man's life - his little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love. ~William Wordsworth
Never ever, walk into a meeting cold. Because cold is how you'll leave it.
Instead, walk in ready to spread around what I call “universal currency” – ways to be generous and spread goodwill to anyone that we meet. Generosity is the first step to warming up to a relationship.
Universal currency is particularly important at first meetings and interviews, where even if you do your homework, you may be limited in your background knowledge.
Here are five forms of universal currency and suggestions for how to put them into play. Read more →
Posted on January 28th, 2010 by Keith Ferrazzi
Where to start from my trip to China? Orphanages, learnings from the meeting of a huge global company meeting, walking the streets in a not-so-strange city... Let's start with the kids.
Special Needs, Special Kids
We visited two orphanages. It's orphanage two I'd like to focus on (video below!) -- a child care center for mentally disabled children, under-funded compared to its fancy counterpart across town (and in Shanghai, across town is at least an hour drive or more). My friend Tim Shriver has lead the Special Olympics and spoken to me for years about both the need for and the joy volunteers get from working with these kids.
Read more →
Posted on January 21st, 2010 by Keith Ferrazzi
In the Stones documentary Shine the Light, Martin Scorsese asks Keith Richards who he thinks is the better guitarist, himself or Ronnie Wood. The question was tongue-in-cheek, but Keith answers in kind:
"The truth is we are both sh*t - but together - we are better than any ten…"
Thanks to Jason Jon for sending this anecdote my way. Forward it to your favorite colleagues!
Who's the Ronnie Wood to your Keith Richards, and what makes the relationship/collaboration so effective?
